Hii followers,
Today I write highly inspired and excited to write about my one year anniversary of moving to North Carolina.
I remember that day like it was yesterday. That day, June 9th, 2010, I had no fear. I had confidence, a dream, and a trusted Garmin--the three important ingredients of which I credit my success.
The fear did come though. The weeks of living in North Carolina without a job or even a call back. The days I spent in the library and coffee shops applying for job after job. The countless revisions of my resume and cover letter and with each revision--even small ones gave me confidence that that would be the perfect change--the catalyst for a call back. An interview.
The day my nephew was born 1800 miles away. The irrational fear that I will miss his entire life and still be unemployed. The fear of never getting a call back. That was real fear.
But mind over matter proved sufficient yet again. I didn't talk about my fears, I only stayed focused on my dream. I knew two things, I knew that my dream was real and I knew that I had X amount of dollars to spend before I would have to reevaluate my dream.
Despite no call backs, I was constantly inspired. Probably the height of inspiration in my life to date were the days, weeks, and months that my number was never called. My brain, my mind was clear and the inspiration seemed to come easily and from unpredictable sources. The billboard "Zero to Bachelors in 2.5," The bike rides on Duke Campus, the nacho, hot dog, and lemonade stand on the corner by DUMC, going to church in Downtown Durham to see several people rocking Duke T'shirts, the free summer league games at NC-Central where I saw Kyrie Irving, Plumlees, Ryan Kelly, Singler, Harrison Barnes---all inspired me. I knew my dream was real and it was evidenced by the constant forms of inspiration I experienced during my unemployment.
I knew on a Sunday that I would be called that week for an interview. I could see online that one of my applications was moved from "processed" to "Hiring manager review." I knew that my time was coming. I just knew it.
On a Tuesday I was called. I scheduled my interview for the first possibility. The Friday, 0830 before Forth of July weekend. I thought by taking the first possible choice would be taken well. As initiative. Only to hang up and go immediately to the library to read books on interviewing and job selection. The first chapter of the first book I read was all about scheduling an interview. And it had several tips. It did state that sometimes the job applicant does not have the choice of which interview spot to select but if you do (and I did) then it would be important to consider these tips. 1) Try not to schedule an interview first thing in the morning, during lunch, or late afternoon. (0830) Avoid Monday or Friday interviews (Friday). Avoid scheduling an interview on a holiday weekend (4th of July).
I successfully neglected to follow ANY of the recommendations as my interview was scheduled for 0830 on the Friday before 4th of July. Sigh.
Interview went really well despite my three strikes on scheduling it. I was prepared and excited. And at conclusion of the interview I was asked to schedule a time to shadow the department.
I shadowed. And was told that I would learn of my hire by July 26th. I planned that epic day. I told my family and friends that that was the day I was waiting for my entire life. It was a Tuesday. That day came and you can bet that my phone was in my hand the entire day. I felt ridiculous as I carried that phone around everywhere--sure that if I left it unattended for a minute, I would miss the call and miss my chance.
It rang only once but that is all that it needed too. I heard it ring, felt it vibrate, and before looking at the number, I planned my entire career at Duke, I could see the next 30 years, the promotions the experience, going back to school, getting my doctorate, becoming a professor at Duke, being a chair at Duke, raising a family at Duke, sending all my children to Duke and having a retirement party with all the tops at Duke---and my consolation prize= A 9 minute message from my mom. Disappointing to say the least.
I woke up the next day and I needed a break. I would not apply for any new jobs today. I would not think about the interview or all that went well or went bad. I needed a break.
I packed up my tent and my bike and drove to the beach. My phone rang again. My mom. I answered and could intensely hear my mom's support and concern. She knew that I didn't get the call the day before just because mom's know that stuff and I didn't call bragging about it. She said she didn't want to talk long but that she was just thinking of me and that she loved me and was praying for me...I remember feeling very satisfied with her call and really appreciating it. Though disappointed for sure.
Before she hung up---I got a beep. A 919 beep. They were calling! I told my mom that they were beeping in.
They offered me the job! They offered me the job! I called my mom back.
The rest is history. It has been by no stretch seamless but it's been possible. And I keep working hard. Keep learning. Keep trying new things. Keep looking for inspiration. Keep formulating new goals and new dreams.
People ask me a lot, what the hardest part was and today that question seems very simple. The hardest part was going from expert student and tech to novice nurse. (Patricia Benner is my nurse theorist idol and has a model from novice to expert that is very popular) And while I very much agree in all that she says in that model, I think--at least for me--it has been much harder going from expert to novice.
While I am very happy to have made it this year and have had the opportunities that I have had, I recognize, now, that I am still only 24 years old and don't have it all figured out. I have spent a lot of time on this dream and have some melt downs as far as what my next dream is. For today, my "Livin' the dream" story is just giving myself a shot. Putting myself in position to be successful. To be happy. To always recognize where there is potential and to seek it out. To keep a high threshold for risk.
I will leave Duke when I can get dressed, put my name badge on, and clock in, without smiling, without being inspired, without thinking, "dang, this is pretty cool."
And just like that...time for work now. Rockin' the Duke scrubs.
ak
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Girl lies about murder charge to get a date
Onion: Girl lies about murder charge to get a date
We have all heard the phrase, "nice guys finish last." But is this phrase any more true today than when it was first coined in the 1930's by American biologist, Garrett Hardin? One girl risked it all when falsely turning herself in for a murder she never committed. Why'd she do it? We sent reporters to find out...and you will be shocked with what we found out.
AK a 24 year old girl turned herself in for the unsolved murder that occurred in 1975. If you can't figure that out, punch yourself in the throat and get back to your cosmo magazine. We approached AK in her meticulously clean 2 bedroom Durham apartment which she refers to as her sanctuary. The soft spoken confident girl offered us a Capri Sun and answered all of our questions with poise and ease.
Why did you admit to a murder that you absolutely could not have committed? "Oh, you guys are hear to talk about that? I did it for game.
Game? "Yes, you know dating game. See I want to be in a relationship with someone, I want to have friends and after trying for so long I finally figured out what my problem was. I am to nice. People don't want to date nice people, people like the asshole so I made up a story about how I murdered someone."
"I would have never thought about it before I watched an episode of "Prison Wives." A show about convicted murders and their attempts to find love outside of prison by writing letters and communicating via telephone and supervised visits. I watched this and at first was very disturbed and sad. I had just become ok with the idea that women with IQs of less than 120 were finding love and getting married, I wasn't prepared to see that convicted murders were finding love. So I had a choice, be disturbed and sad or use this as an opportunity. I obviously chose the latter or you wouldn't be here right now."
The whole world is wondering, has it worked? "Oh hell yes, I can't even describe to you how this has affected my dating life. It now actually exist. The world is changing in a sad sad direction and since becoming part of that sad sad direction, my dating life has improved 100 fold. "
What do your friends and family say, "At first, they thought I had gone crazy and tried to commit me but after they thought about it for a few minutes they knew that I was only doing what I had to do for myself. They often told me that I needed to be mean more otherwise people would take advantage of me. In fact, all my friends and co-workers have always told me that. I was just not ready yet."
And what made you ready? "hahaha, good question, I have just been dumped to many times. I still expect to be dumped a lot more times but at least now I will never have to hear the lamest excuse ever, "your just to nice for me."
Thank you for your time. And welcome to world of assholes. You might want to rethink your super nintendo poster if you want to bring any of your dates home with you. And then AK kicked us both in the shins and we walked out.
We have all heard the phrase, "nice guys finish last." But is this phrase any more true today than when it was first coined in the 1930's by American biologist, Garrett Hardin? One girl risked it all when falsely turning herself in for a murder she never committed. Why'd she do it? We sent reporters to find out...and you will be shocked with what we found out.
AK a 24 year old girl turned herself in for the unsolved murder that occurred in 1975. If you can't figure that out, punch yourself in the throat and get back to your cosmo magazine. We approached AK in her meticulously clean 2 bedroom Durham apartment which she refers to as her sanctuary. The soft spoken confident girl offered us a Capri Sun and answered all of our questions with poise and ease.
Why did you admit to a murder that you absolutely could not have committed? "Oh, you guys are hear to talk about that? I did it for game.
Game? "Yes, you know dating game. See I want to be in a relationship with someone, I want to have friends and after trying for so long I finally figured out what my problem was. I am to nice. People don't want to date nice people, people like the asshole so I made up a story about how I murdered someone."
"I would have never thought about it before I watched an episode of "Prison Wives." A show about convicted murders and their attempts to find love outside of prison by writing letters and communicating via telephone and supervised visits. I watched this and at first was very disturbed and sad. I had just become ok with the idea that women with IQs of less than 120 were finding love and getting married, I wasn't prepared to see that convicted murders were finding love. So I had a choice, be disturbed and sad or use this as an opportunity. I obviously chose the latter or you wouldn't be here right now."
The whole world is wondering, has it worked? "Oh hell yes, I can't even describe to you how this has affected my dating life. It now actually exist. The world is changing in a sad sad direction and since becoming part of that sad sad direction, my dating life has improved 100 fold. "
What do your friends and family say, "At first, they thought I had gone crazy and tried to commit me but after they thought about it for a few minutes they knew that I was only doing what I had to do for myself. They often told me that I needed to be mean more otherwise people would take advantage of me. In fact, all my friends and co-workers have always told me that. I was just not ready yet."
And what made you ready? "hahaha, good question, I have just been dumped to many times. I still expect to be dumped a lot more times but at least now I will never have to hear the lamest excuse ever, "your just to nice for me."
Thank you for your time. And welcome to world of assholes. You might want to rethink your super nintendo poster if you want to bring any of your dates home with you. And then AK kicked us both in the shins and we walked out.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
.....it comes every month
Hi and holy absence. I have neglected the blog and take full responsibility for that. However, refer to my first blog when I stated the ground rules, I will blog when I want to blog.
It comes every month---because all of my blog followers be female, I assume that you are all thinking that this blog will be about periods but it is not.
Chores used to be my sole opportunity for income. Doing household chores were the only way to feed my appetite for a bag of Cheetos or 10 blow pops. Doing chores ensured me $5 a week to do with what I please. I didn't like doing them but I did.
Today chores are an everyday part of my life and instead of $5 a week, I have a clean apartment and a clean car. I expired all my energy complaining about chores before I ever left home. Now I just know that they are part of the deal and I find no reason to complain about them. In fact, it is even kind of frustrating for me to hear other people complain about doing the dishes or vacuuming. I guess I would have just thought that, like me, everyone would have complained enough about doing mindless task such as dishes in their youth and that by the time they are adults, they just know that every time you decide to eat, you also decide to do dishes.
Their is one chore that I do absolutely hate and that is laundry and for me it comes once a month. I feel very comfortable about complaining about laundry and also feel very justified in my complaint. I hate laundry for multiple reasons.
I hate laundry because it is the only chore that you can't rush, you can't get all pumped up to do laundry "real fast" and then go somewhere. The washer will go through its full cycle and regardless of your energy level, the washer will only wash at its pace. And the dryer will only dry at its pace.
I hate laundry because it takes the same amount of time to wash one thing as it does for 30 things. Yes, you can cut your drying time down by only drying one shirt but at minimum, you will still invest 30 minutes of your day washing one shirt.
I hate laundry because from the time you press start on the washer and the time the washer horns, you are absolutely helpless to what is being done to your clothes. You can only hope that you checked every pocket for an ink pen, sorted appropriately, and have the washer on the right setting.
I hate laundry because you can't ever "walk away from it." Once you are invested, once you make that decision to do laundry, you are hooked and for at least the next two hours of your life, you are indebted to your laundry. Ok, you can walk away in an emergency but if you choose to do so, know that when you come back to it, you will be back to square one. If you leave the clothes in the washer to long, they start to smell and if you leave them in the dryer to long, they begin to wrinkle.
I hate doing laundry because it is so unsatisfying. Nobody will ever comment on how clean your clothes are--it's just an expectation. It is the longest chore to complete yet the least satisfying. It takes 10 minutes to do all the dishes, spray some Mr. Clean on the counter and wipe it off and your guest will walk into your home and comment on how clean your place is, but you just spent an entire evening doing laundry and nobody notices. Furthermore, they will only notice if you didn't do laundry and you rock your favorite t-shirt with a blob of bar-b-que sauce on it--now your a dirty person but if you invite people over and your place is a mess, people excuse it without further ado.
I hate doing laundry because all month I trip over hangers, I move 3, 4 hangers out of the way to get to the shirt of my choice and then come laundry day, I need more hangers! I promise, you will NEVER have enough hangers on laundry day. It's just a fact, doesn't matter how many you buy, you will never have enough on laundry day. You know the stores sell the most hangers on Sunday? It is true, all week long there is every shape, color, and size of hanger, but you go to Wal-Mart on Sunday evening and all of a sudden a 10 pack of white hangers is harder to find than the latest video game during Christmas season. Trust me, I wouldn't lie to you. If you are skeptical, check it out yourself...
I hate doing laundry because once you start a load of laundry, you naturally get yourself in the cleaning mood. And it will never fail that you will start cleaning. I think it is almost a tick or involuntary action that all humans assume and I mean since you will spend the next several hours at home doing laundry, you might as well get some cleaning done, right? Absolutely right, and so you do. And what do you have after a few hours of cleaning the bathrooms and kitchen? You have at least two or three dirty washcloths so now you have more decisions to make. You know these washcloths need cleaned, they look far worse than any one piece of clothing you put into the washer but everybody knows that three washcloths do not make up a whole load so what do you do? Maybe just bite the energy cost and wash them, maybe just toss them in the garbage because, even yourself, is disgusted with how dirty they are, or maybe you toss them in the hamper and put them off for next month.
I hate doing laundry because I hate buying laundry soap. Why is it that laundry soap is so much more expensive then dish soap or shampoo? I think its a conspiracy. I think it is because those who make laundry soap know that regardless of how much it cost, people are going to buy it. You might try to cut cost and switch from Tide with Febreeze to the Great Value brand but even still, it is expensive. We all do it, we all buy laundry soap and we all hate buying it but never does that stop us from buying it because we aren't going to stop doing laundry, even if we hate it.
I hate doing laundry because it is one chore that I just cannot delegate. I don't want anybody else touching my laundry. Other chores that I hate I could easily pay someone else to do but not laundry. I am forever stuck with the one chore that I hate because under no circumstance will I pay for someone to go through each article of my clothing and judge me for it--what size I wear, what brands I like, the hard stale wash cloths at the bottom of the hamper, the dirty socks, the shirts with holes in them but I love anyway, no way would I make myself vulnerable to that so instead, I will do laundry every month, and I will complain about it.
You better know that on this Sunday evening, my laundry is done and all put away---besides four shirts laying on my bed without a hanger to hang them on.....damn
Enjoy your lives,
ak
It comes every month---because all of my blog followers be female, I assume that you are all thinking that this blog will be about periods but it is not.
Chores used to be my sole opportunity for income. Doing household chores were the only way to feed my appetite for a bag of Cheetos or 10 blow pops. Doing chores ensured me $5 a week to do with what I please. I didn't like doing them but I did.
Today chores are an everyday part of my life and instead of $5 a week, I have a clean apartment and a clean car. I expired all my energy complaining about chores before I ever left home. Now I just know that they are part of the deal and I find no reason to complain about them. In fact, it is even kind of frustrating for me to hear other people complain about doing the dishes or vacuuming. I guess I would have just thought that, like me, everyone would have complained enough about doing mindless task such as dishes in their youth and that by the time they are adults, they just know that every time you decide to eat, you also decide to do dishes.
Their is one chore that I do absolutely hate and that is laundry and for me it comes once a month. I feel very comfortable about complaining about laundry and also feel very justified in my complaint. I hate laundry for multiple reasons.
I hate laundry because it is the only chore that you can't rush, you can't get all pumped up to do laundry "real fast" and then go somewhere. The washer will go through its full cycle and regardless of your energy level, the washer will only wash at its pace. And the dryer will only dry at its pace.
I hate laundry because it takes the same amount of time to wash one thing as it does for 30 things. Yes, you can cut your drying time down by only drying one shirt but at minimum, you will still invest 30 minutes of your day washing one shirt.
I hate laundry because from the time you press start on the washer and the time the washer horns, you are absolutely helpless to what is being done to your clothes. You can only hope that you checked every pocket for an ink pen, sorted appropriately, and have the washer on the right setting.
I hate laundry because you can't ever "walk away from it." Once you are invested, once you make that decision to do laundry, you are hooked and for at least the next two hours of your life, you are indebted to your laundry. Ok, you can walk away in an emergency but if you choose to do so, know that when you come back to it, you will be back to square one. If you leave the clothes in the washer to long, they start to smell and if you leave them in the dryer to long, they begin to wrinkle.
I hate doing laundry because it is so unsatisfying. Nobody will ever comment on how clean your clothes are--it's just an expectation. It is the longest chore to complete yet the least satisfying. It takes 10 minutes to do all the dishes, spray some Mr. Clean on the counter and wipe it off and your guest will walk into your home and comment on how clean your place is, but you just spent an entire evening doing laundry and nobody notices. Furthermore, they will only notice if you didn't do laundry and you rock your favorite t-shirt with a blob of bar-b-que sauce on it--now your a dirty person but if you invite people over and your place is a mess, people excuse it without further ado.
I hate doing laundry because all month I trip over hangers, I move 3, 4 hangers out of the way to get to the shirt of my choice and then come laundry day, I need more hangers! I promise, you will NEVER have enough hangers on laundry day. It's just a fact, doesn't matter how many you buy, you will never have enough on laundry day. You know the stores sell the most hangers on Sunday? It is true, all week long there is every shape, color, and size of hanger, but you go to Wal-Mart on Sunday evening and all of a sudden a 10 pack of white hangers is harder to find than the latest video game during Christmas season. Trust me, I wouldn't lie to you. If you are skeptical, check it out yourself...
I hate doing laundry because once you start a load of laundry, you naturally get yourself in the cleaning mood. And it will never fail that you will start cleaning. I think it is almost a tick or involuntary action that all humans assume and I mean since you will spend the next several hours at home doing laundry, you might as well get some cleaning done, right? Absolutely right, and so you do. And what do you have after a few hours of cleaning the bathrooms and kitchen? You have at least two or three dirty washcloths so now you have more decisions to make. You know these washcloths need cleaned, they look far worse than any one piece of clothing you put into the washer but everybody knows that three washcloths do not make up a whole load so what do you do? Maybe just bite the energy cost and wash them, maybe just toss them in the garbage because, even yourself, is disgusted with how dirty they are, or maybe you toss them in the hamper and put them off for next month.
I hate doing laundry because I hate buying laundry soap. Why is it that laundry soap is so much more expensive then dish soap or shampoo? I think its a conspiracy. I think it is because those who make laundry soap know that regardless of how much it cost, people are going to buy it. You might try to cut cost and switch from Tide with Febreeze to the Great Value brand but even still, it is expensive. We all do it, we all buy laundry soap and we all hate buying it but never does that stop us from buying it because we aren't going to stop doing laundry, even if we hate it.
I hate doing laundry because it is one chore that I just cannot delegate. I don't want anybody else touching my laundry. Other chores that I hate I could easily pay someone else to do but not laundry. I am forever stuck with the one chore that I hate because under no circumstance will I pay for someone to go through each article of my clothing and judge me for it--what size I wear, what brands I like, the hard stale wash cloths at the bottom of the hamper, the dirty socks, the shirts with holes in them but I love anyway, no way would I make myself vulnerable to that so instead, I will do laundry every month, and I will complain about it.
You better know that on this Sunday evening, my laundry is done and all put away---besides four shirts laying on my bed without a hanger to hang them on.....damn
Enjoy your lives,
ak
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